Checkered Trousers & a Chic Tote

Stop the freaking press, I’m wearing jogging pants.

Have I changed the way I dress? Nop, I was trekking through plants.

In comfortable slacks, but like I vowed: sneakers were still not allowed.

I’ll stop the rhymes and wait for the applause.

(I’m the cheesiest b*tch there ever was…)

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